Friday, December 17, 2010

Time to reflect

December is always a tough month. 

I just put too much pressure on myself. 

Here is a small list of things that I hope to accomplish before the end of the year:. 
  • Initiate peace talks between North and South Korea
  • Write a Grammy award winning song and boast that I'm better than Kanye
  • Go camping with Sarah Palin
  • Become adopted by Angelina Jolie
  • Invent a website that someone wants to buy for 10 billion dollars
  • Scare people into good health like Dr. Oz does
  • Travel to infinity and beyond
  • Hire Jane Lynch as a life coach
  • See what all the fuss is about
  • Do an Old Spice commercial
  • Swim to Cambodia 
  • Receive one ridiculously huge coupon a day
  • Eliminate spam mail completely
  • Bitch slap a really rich housewife
  • Find Obama's birth certificate
  • Ask Mark Madoff if it was worth it
  • Achieve Nirvana
  • Stop biting my fingernails
  • Get an iPhone 4 and an iPad and marry them in a civil ceremony
  • Watch the third season of True Blood
  • Have more than 5 followers on my blog
  • Make more than $10 from my blog
  • Tell DrPhil he's fat
  • Party like a rich Armenian
  • Find out where Armenia is
  • Become a big fish in a little pond
  • Update my status
  • Get censored on Sesame Street
  • Become a modern family
  • Start a religion and call my disciples Phillopians
  • Have an immortal life like Henrietta Lacks
  • Sleep all day and party all night
  • Become the mayor of Wasilla
  • Try a little tenderness
  • Make fondue and attend a key party
  • Experiment with a home perm
  • Prepare an Oscar speech
  • Find out how they get the caramel into the Caramilk bar
  • Dance with the devil in the pale moonlight
  • Teach people about hummus or Hamas, if they want
  • Buy a suit
  • Buy a shirt
  • Buy underwear
  • Not feel guilty for wearing briefs (junk control)
  • Handle rejection
  • Laugh at the moment
  • Believe in myself or at least a better version of myself
  • Let my new life begin
  • Get physical
  • Eat vegetables
  • Make bad decisions to have better stories
  • Forget regret
  • Stay out of the rain
  • Raise money for The Savong Foundation
  • Bend the rules
  • Have a bathroom I can play baseball in
  • Change my name to Captain Awesome
And a few other things like save the planet and stuff like that. 

I only have two weeks left before the end of the year.  It's no wonder I'm stressed! 

I've included a picture for those people who follow my blog but don't like reading.  I call it a creative self-portrait. 

Hope everyone is enjoying the last days of 2010!
Books to enjoy!  Or not! 

The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks
America by Heart : Reflections on Family, Faith, and Flag
The Art of Racing in the Rain: A Novel
Swimming to Cambodia

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